Out with the Old, In with the New

Well, the times they are a changing . . . as well as probably my job . . . again.

We just got the news today that our Freshman enrollment for next year is down by 80 students. Bummer. This means that at most we'll be able to keep our current staff, which also means that my head is pretty much on the chopping block as I'm the only one with a one-year contract.

In a lot of ways this really shouldn't be a big deal as, really, it was only a one-year contract any way. I still had to reapply. I still had to actually get offered the job again. I guess I was just kind of optimistic that I'd get to stay. Everything just fell into line so perfectly. I knew I was meant to have this job.

At this point, I'm still trying to stay optimistic. This gives me another opportunity to stretch myself. I'm hoping I can find another job in-district. Maybe this is a chance for another change.

Part of me is starting to consider trying out for middle school again. I really liked a lot of aspects about teaching middle school, but I also really like a lot of aspects about high school. Most people seem to have a preference. They'll say, "Oh, I would never teach middle school," or "High school is really just not my cup of tea." For me, though, I love them both for different reasons. I love the subject matter of both--middle school has amazing YA lit to explore and high school has delve-worthy literature. Middle schoolers have tons of energy and enthusiasm. High schoolers have drive and a some-what more defined sense of self. I would be happy either place. I must be nuts. The only problem comes in interviews when the principal seems to think that whichever type of school their at is the superior level. I'll get questions like, "So, why middle school?" or just the opposite, "So, why high school?" And even though I can answer for either question, part of me feels dishonest. It seems like they're looking for me to be gung-ho only about their school. And I am gung-ho about their school and their level whatever job. It's just the whole word "only" that gets to me. Why do I have to choose? If I can do either, why not let me try out for either? Oh well. Point belabored.

So, back to the beginning. Possibly leaving. (Notice, the word possibly is still attached!). I've been involved with so many clubs this year and gotten to meet so many amazing kids. Between litmag club and book club and drama stuff, I just feel like I've met some kids with so much to offer. I'd love to keep working with them. I've also learned so much about teaching the subject matter and the age group. I feel like I'd just be giving up all of the new material. No matter what school I go to (even if I stay in-district), the material's going to be different. The demographics are going to be different. Pretty much everything will just be different.

I'm coming to the conclusion, however, that this is kind of going to be like EFY* for me. I had always wanted to be an EFY counselor. I never thought I actually could, but it was most definitely a goal of mine. So, when the interview just showed up at Institute one blustery Thursday night when I so jumped on the bandwagon and signed up for an interview and wonder of wonders, they hired me. My schedule only worked with one week, but there I was. I even was picked so sing a solo for a musical performance. It was magical. It was my dream. And it was hard. There was so much there that I expected to be hard. I had been to EFY before. I knew what to expect. I was tired and I was always being pushed for time and I was scared as heck that I was doing something wrong. I botched part of my song and there were girls that I felt like a failure with. But overall, I learned so many things. It was an amazing experience I wouldn't be the same without. While I was in it, though, I just kept thinking, well, next year I can do this, and next year I can try that. However, now that I'm trying to plan out the summer it doesn't look like EFY is going to be an option. I may not be able to go back to EFY, but EFY isn't the only place I can apply those lessons. I just have to apply that same thinking to my current job.

One important thing I learned at EFY was just to cheerfully do. So for now, that's what I'm going to do. Cheerfully.



*EFY stands for Especially for Youth and is a program for youth ages 14 through 18 year looking to learn more about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and run through the Department of Continuing Education at Brigham Young University.